Top 10 Things We Learned in Newborn Classes

Since Justin and I have ZERO experience with a newborn we decided to sign up for some classes through the hospital that we are delivering at. We, or should I say I, signed us up for newborn care class, breastfeeding class, and birthing class. We graduated last night from our classes and even received a certificate. I guess if anyone questions our parenting ability we can pull out our certificate to prove that we really have been trained to take care of our baby. We learned so much about caring for a newborn. Since there was so much that we had no idea about I have decided to name this blog "Top 10 Things We Learned in Newborn Classes". Here we go:
10) When the baby comes out it will have a cone head. I thought there was just a movie called Coneheads. I didn't know it really happens.
9) I can't get my epidural until my contractions are 4 minutes apart lasting 1 minute long for 1 hour. OMG...what am I suppose to do for pain before the magic shot?!?!
8) A baby could use 12 to 15 diapers a day. I calculated that up and lets just say we could have another car payment for the amount of diapers we are going to use.
7) The first couple of diapers will look like tar. Did you know something so disgusting could come out of something so precious?!?!?
6) When breastfeeding I need to feed the baby every 1 to 3 hours. Sleep? Who needs sleep?
5) The best way to take the babies temperature is in the butt. For some reason they did not let us practice how to do that...I guess there were no volunteers.
4) If the baby spits up or has a running nose we have to suction it out. I get queasy when I see my own snot what am I suppose to do with my child's?
3) The umbilical cord will not fall off for about 2 weeks. I don't know what was more disturbing...knowing that one morning I could wake up to find my babies umbilical cord laying next to it or finding out that there are parents out there that keep the fallen off cord for a keepsake.
2) There really should be a screening for people before they have children. Some people should not reproduce.

And the number 1 thing we learned from all of these classes....

1) We can't wait to meet our little Gavin or Phoebe and no matter what we are going to have such an adventure that we both are excited about!